Bus Boat

So as you know by reading my reading my blog, I live in Baltimore or as often fondly referred, Charm City. Sometimes known as the Big Crab Cake, The City That Bleeds and (Ugh.. Hold on, let me look up some other nicknames) B’More, the Greatest City in America and the Comeback City. Hmmmmm.. I’ve never heard of those last two either, but according to good ole’ Wikipedia, those are indeed nicknames for my hometown.  If you are a first time reader and were unaware of these facts, or didn’t really care to begin with, Hi! Welcome to my blog, for purposes of background to this story, I live in Baltimore, Maryland. Listen to me, all self-important, acting as if you the reader actually care about such facts. Come to think of it, according to wordpress stats, you the reader have been frequenting my blog less and less. Thanks! Give me a complex, will you?

Back to my story. Did I mention I get distracted easily? I’ll try to stay on topic here, I promise this time.

Ok, being nestled next to the Chesapeake, Baltimore has a sizable waterfront and obviously a great deal of tourism, business and nightlife sit on the waterfront in the various neighborhoods. Therefore it is no surprise that the use of public transportation in my city has extended into the water. That’s fine and dandy, I get that and I am all for it. What I don’t get though is the name they have chosen for the service..

Water Taxi..

Does this look like any taxi you've ever seen?

Yeah, that’s right, Water Taxi. On the surface, sounds pretty benign right? Well let me explain the premise of  “Water Taxi” and then think about it. Water Taxi essentially serves as a scheduled shuttle with time tables, specific stops and specific fares for length of travel. Now I don’t know about where you live, but if this service was on the land, we would call it a bus!!  Are the proprietors of Water Taxi” completely unfamiliar with modes of public land transportation? What kinda of land taxi has scheduled stops and specific routes? NONE OF THEM!! Heck, even the designers of the early 80’s Commodore 64 video game “Space Taxi” understood the difference between a taxi and a bus, and they were probably computer developers who never left their house. That was a cool game by the way. You should try it. Ugh..

Space Taxi

Well, a few years ago on a drunken stumble home from one of the many aforementioned watering holes along the Baltimore waterfront, I came up with a brilliant idea to challenge Water Taxi’s domination of the high (low?) seas. I called it Bus Boat.  Since I figured Water Taxi wasn’t really a taxi, I figured Bus Boat wouldn’t be a bus in the true sense of the word. Bus Boat would operate as a taxi, but on the water. Since “Water Taxi” was already taken, I would do them one better and take the obvious name they should have taken. Bus Boat! So how would Bus Boat work, you ask? Thank you, glad someone is still reading. Well simply put, you would hail bus boat from the shore and bus boat would take you anywhere along the waterfront you needed to go. Seems like a great idea to me. That night, on my walk home, I imagined the endless flow of wealth coming in from my successful venture. All Hail the mighty Bus Boat!!

Naturally when I woke up the next morning, I came to the realization I lacked a few of the essentials I would need to get Bus Boat up and running, namely capital, a boating license, any real business experience and of course an actual boat. Maybe Bus Boat wasn’t one of my more brilliant moments of inspiration, but it certainly wasn’t a horrible idea! The name is kinda cool and hey, who wouldn’t want a boat to take them anywhere they needed to go.


2 comments so far

  1. Patrick on

    I was there for bus boat!

  2. hitmanterp on

    …and it was a good idea!

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